Burning Man 2012 Insights

My fourth burn turned out to be my favorite thus far with equal doses of takeaways and fun. In my third year I started to feel like the magic of the event was starting to wear thin as I wasn’t pushing myself to participate fully and I started spectating more. This year I participated a good deal and in general saw the burn with fresher eyes.

Takeaways included:

Wandering

I spent a great degree of time with no plan, or even thought about plans, on the playa. If fact, I didn’t even open the “What, Where, When” guide for this year (generally I go through and, at the very least, circle what I’m interested in). I’ve always enjoyed wandering, and returning from the playa gave me insight into just how important it is for me to set aside time where there is no agenda except exploration. James and I have already traveled a little more than normal since returning and hope to continue wandering for some time during the year. That said wandering doesn't have be through travel, it can be through simply taking a moment to poke around a tea shop on Castro or meander the farmer's market. Small and random bursts of wanderfullness are rejuvenating. 

Expression

I felt more expressed this year and not as self conscious as usual. I’ve even kept up a few photos from Burning Man that normally I would likely not have floating around, though my take at this point is that if someone can’t handle that I’m a burner, than we’re probably not a fit and that’s ok. In addition, I really liked my clothing choices for this year, they were more bold and more contrasting than I’ve tried before. Fun times. 

I was also more expressed emotionally. James and I had some good talks, one where I was frustrated and was able to express it in a way that he could hear me, and it felt good to blow off some steam. On the flip side, I also was more affectionate with him around others (normally I get shy about public displays of affection).

Screen time

This was one of the sadder parts of getting back to everyday life, screen time. It was a drastic change to go from being on the playa and wandering everyday to having my life encompass a glowing box for multiple hours on end. I went from whole oyster to whole computer and have been working on achieving some balance there. That said, the only thing I’ve found that works thus far is just putting the computer away for multiple hours and getting outside/wandering. Still working on this one.

Sight

I really didn’t enjoy lack of vision in the evening without glasses this particular year. It was particularly dusty as well, so near-sightedness plus dust was no fun. I have my appointment to get Lasik done in mid-October.

Energy 

A few things came up in this arena. One of which is that both myself and James have a desire to gravitate towards more heart-centered friendships and connections. It’s not to say that smarts are bad or anything like that, just that the people we enjoy spending time with the most have a good balance between their heart and head and aren’t afraid to lead with the heart. We’d also like to cultivate more of this in our own interactions and day to day lives.

I’ve also had some insights about energetic/vibe fit with friends and activities [insert California hippie jokes here]. For a long time, if something didn’t feel like a fit I would generally analyze what in my perception about the situation was off or try to figure out a way to make it better which took up a lot of time and energy. Beforehand, I felt it meant something bad, like "this person is a pain in the ass," as opposed to just an energy mismatch. I’ve since learned to “bounce” when something feels off without having a big judgement made out of it or needing to analyze the situation at all. I just see that moment (whether with a person or activity) as not a fit and I get up and go. I’ve been practicing “bouncing” at parties and social things because normally I’d stay longer in a situation even if I didn’t want to or was ready for something else. So, if we’re hanging out and I go to “bounce,” no offense, I’m just needing a different type of setting or energy in that moment.

It has felt really good to just move when I’m ready without any of the silly head games, in addition to being lot more authentic and spontaneous as well. Now I’m just trying to figure out what to do when I get the urge to bounce but I’m in a spot where I feel restricted from doing so but don’t want to go back into the analysis head game of before. Ideas?

Managing Fear 

I had a great talk with Spencer Greenberg about managing fear and anxiety and he talked about spending time at the uncomfortable edges as an alternative to pure emersion techniques. I practiced this a few times while out at the burn and it paid off well. I climbed off a structure which included a bit of a jump that I was afraid of and also stayed out later than I have before (which I usually would have feared resulting in feeling off the next day) and enjoyed myself. In one of my last yoga practices the instructor talked about trying to breathe deeply into the areas that were at an edge, and I’ll have to keep this in mind for both physical and mental practices from now on.

Alright, not sure how to close this one off. Time to bounce!

Danielle